Man Vs Child: Who Is Easier To Look After?

This week my daughter’s father did his back in and was ordered to lie down with an ice pack until it repaired itself.

I found myself run off my feet caring for two dependents who needed me to cut up their food, fetch out-of-reach objects, help them to bed and tuck them in.

As I trudged into the kitchen to make an umpteenth cup of tea, I couldn’t help thinking my toddler suddenly seemed a lot less demanding after all.

So which is easier to take care of? An unwell, thirty-something male or a naughty, sixteen-month-old girl?

Man

Child

Getting Up Sleeps in and accepts a cup of coffee, a piece of toast and two ibuprofen when it happens to be offered. Would be relatively easy if it weren’t for the effort of relocating bedding to the sofa. Wakes at sunrise and soon begins shouting for food and attention.  Not content to lie in and must be carried downstairs and given cereal which it throws everywhere and immediately cements to every surface.

Winner: Man

Entertainment

and Attention

Placing remote control in hand is all that is required. Although continual channel surfing of dining and property shows is a little grating. Empties and scatters every single toy across every part of floor of every single room.  Quickly tires of toys and begins trying to steal remote control, phone, and any other breakable or dangerous object in or out of reach. Requires fresh air, games, songs, tickles and constant re-readings of the same book.

Winner: Man

Catering All food must be cut up in order that it can be consumed with a fork in one hand, and covered with copious amounts of hot sauce. Complains about the menu but begrudgingly eats it anyway. Happily consumes everything on offer with fingers after attempting to use spoon and asks for more. Protests at having face and hands wiped afterwards.

Winner: Child

Demands Repeatedly asks for a beer even though medical advice is against. Requests that child is not left playing in way of telly when rugby is on. Constant pleas for snacks, stories, objects that are not toys, whines if ignored for too long and wants to jump up and down on Daddy.

Winner: Tie

Additional Care Regular ice pack changes, freezing gel rubs and medication dispension. Nappy changes, bathing and putting to bed, all of which result in semi-naked escapes.

Winner: Man

Grattitude

Despite complaining about the catering, is surprisingly and pathetically grateful. Clearly not faking it, like when he had ‘flu’.

Absolutely none whatsoever. In fact, mostly resentful of care offered. Does accept occasional kisses and hugs though.

Winner: Man

Well, it seems I must concede that a thirty-something man with a bad back is easier to care for than a toddler. But both at the same time – exhausting!

 

Pink Pear Bear
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2 thoughts on “Man Vs Child: Who Is Easier To Look After?

  1. This is brilliant, love the way you’ve written this post. Sorry you’ve had to look after both a sixteen month old and poorly Hubby though, that does not sound like a fun week! Thank you for sharing with #bigpinklink x (P.S absolutely love the new blog design!!)

    Like

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